Photo by Jonas Kakaroto from Pexels
You’ve done the test, and it’s positive. Congratulations! You’re going to be a mum.
Right now, you are probably feeling a considerable mixture of emotions—excitement, joy, anxiety and possibly a little self-doubt. You may have been planning this with your partner for a long time, or you might have discovered out of the blue. Either way, the next nine months are going to be a roller coaster of emotions, no matter how much support you have.
Pregnancy is a beautiful part of the circle of life. It’s the beginning of a whole new chapter in our lives. From this moment on, you will share your world with a child. While you may already have met the love of your life, the day you find out you are pregnant is the very beginning of your family.
There are lots of changes going on in your body, and you will have a million questions, so this is a quick guide to everything you need to know, from morning sickness to labour.
The First Trimester
Weeks 1-12 of your pregnancy
The start of your pregnancy can be a little confusing. Firstly you will want to know how many weeks pregnant you are. This is worked out from the first day of your last period. If you took a test because you were a few weeks late, you could be well over halfway into your first trimester! Usually, people find out they are pregnant around week 5-6 of their pregnancy. Unless you know exactly when you could have conceived, using your cycle as a way of working out what stage you are at, is the most precise.
The first trimester is the time where your baby is going to do the most growing—starting as a cell before an embryo forms. During this time bones, muscles and all the organs will form and by the end of your trimester, your embryo will become a fetus and look like a tiny human.
This is a great time to think about yoga. While you may not have considered it before, yoga is an excellent way of preparing your body and your mind for labour. It is a low impact exercise that will improve your body strength, getting it ready for giving birth and also helping you discover relaxation techniques that will help you to deal with pain management, especially if you have a natural birth.
During the first few months of pregnancy, you will probably experience morning sickness and fatigue. Morning sickness can happen at any point during the day, and you may also find it last all day. This is normal but can be extraordinarily tiring and make you feel emotional. There are many ways you can help ease nausea, but you will have to experiment. All women are different, so it is hard to give one perfect solution. Even though you might not feel like it, ensuring you have small meals frequently can be beneficial. Some women swear by eating ginger biscuits or sipping ginger tea. Listen to your body. It will tell you what it’s hungry for and what it isn’t. Try not to worry too much if you can’t eat as much as you think you need. You’ll start to feel better around week twelve, and then you can start filling your body with all the right nutrients.
As soon as you find out you are pregnant, you should research all the foods that you should avoid. Too much Vitamin A can be harmful to your growing fetus. Alcohol should be removed from your diet, and if you smoke, you must try to quit as soon as possible. There are lots of organisations out there to help support you with this, but the very best thing you can do for your unborn child is to ditch all the unhealthy habits that you have.
The Second Trimester
Week 13 – 28 of your pregnancy
Around twelve to sixteen weeks your first trimester symptoms should ease up. Now is a great time to start preparing your labour plan. You will have met with your maternity nurse and possibly had your first scan. Some hospitals will let you know the sex of your baby, which is another fascinating milestone. However, you should remember that not all scans are 100 percent accurate. So try to remind yourself that regardless of gender, your baby is a blessing.
This is an excellent time to start antenatal classes. To learn techniques you can use when you are going into labour. You should discuss with your birthing partner, how you would like the labour to happen. There are multiple options so start to think about this now.
Maybe you want a natural birth in a hospital. This is a birth where you don’t have any medical intervention, but you have the support of your birthing team. A water birth is incredibly relaxing and can help to soothe the labour pains that you experience. The other alternative is to choose to have some pain relief. Your maternity nurse can discuss all these options with you.
Some mothers opt to have a home birth. This can be a calmer experience because your own home surrounds you. You will have support when you go into labour, so if any complications happen, there is somebody on standby to help you through it.
Consider how you want to feed your newborn. Speak to your friends to get some simple breastfeeding tips or, if you choose to bottle feed your baby, start to research the best formulas.
Everyone has different opinions on what is best for the baby. While breastfeeding is the most natural way to feed, you might find that giving your baby formula helps you to measure precisely how much food they are getting. It’s also a great way of getting everyone involved and takes one more pressure off you. Whatever you decide, remember that this is your choice. You shouldn’t feel pulled in any direction when it comes to your parental decisions.
The Third Trimester
Week 28 – Birth
Congratulations, you have made it to the last stage of your pregnancy, and very soon you are going to meet your new son or daughter.
The third trimester can be emotionally exhausting. You have got through the morning sickness, you’ve planned how you want to give birth, and now, you are getting bigger and more uncomfortable. It’s common for women to feel mixed emotions. You want your baby to come on the due date, but part of you just wants your body back.
There is no shame in feeling that way; you’ve shared your body with a unique individual for a long time now. You may have been kicked in the middle of the night, or woken up extremely hungry. You’ve suffered heartburn, and you can’t even do your own shoelaces up. Being pregnant shows you that you can enjoy something and be exhausted by it in equal measure!
Of course, some women revel in it. It’s something they adore, and the feeling of carrying a child is enjoyable for every second. You aren’t weird if you don’t feel this way, so please don’t be too hard on yourself.
Your baby is getting ready to join you in the world, and this is the time that labor anxiety might start to kick in. If you have been attending your antenatal classes and doing some yoga throughout your pregnancy, then you really have all the information you need.
Labour is hard work, but the process happens in a few stages. Your early contractions will feel like a tightening around your middle. This builds up slowly, and many women say just as this starts to feel exhausting, the second stage of labour kicks in and you experience a different type of pain. Phase two of labour is more of a dragging pain, you feel like you want to push and it can be quite frustrating if your midwife is telling you that it isn’t time yet. Relax as much as you can, and trust your body to know what to do. The final stage of labour is when you get to push, and although you may be exhausted at this point, you will find the energy to deliver the baby. Focus your mind, and remember all the techniques you have learnt.
Sometimes there can be complications. It’s important to stay calm. The team you have around you will have seen almost every possible complication there is. Listen to them and take their advice, even if this means stepping away from your birthing plan. The most important thing is the health of you and your baby, everything else can wait.
The nine months of your first pregnancy is a magical time, regardless of how tired you may feel, enjoy every moment of it. It will feel like only a few moments have passed when you are holding your beautiful baby son or daughter in your arms.
Congratulations. You now have a fantastic family of your own. You’ll be just fine!
