Fighting The Fashion Fear As A Plus Size Woman

There’s a lot to be said for a fat woman wearing brave outfit choices. What I mean by brave is what society indicates as being brave because it’s not a part of the norm we’re confirmed to believe it correct. We’re told that large women shouldn’t wear stripes, bright colours, patterns, and tight fitting clothes. Then with the same breath. We’re told not to wear things that look too baggy, everything should be flattering, cover up… blah blah blah. Is it any wonder that so many plus size women have been though years of mental torment when it comes to just deciding what to wear on any given day! Even being pregnant now doesn’t let up the trolls!

Fighting The Fashion Fear As A Plus Size Woman -  Pretty Big Butterflies

Wearing plus size jumpsuits - pretty big butterflies

I’m at a point now where I’m pretty confident. I’ve worked on it. My blog and social media have helped a great deal. Seeing beautiful, fat women wearing the most amazing outfits and quite frankly not giving a hoot about what people think. That’s the key. Over the last few years I’ve realised the key is to take control of your own insecurities. Put yourself back in control. Why are you scared to wear that dress? Like, why are you REALLY scared to wear it? I bet it all comes down to other people’s perceptions of you. Well guess what? Screw them. If you like it wear it.

I know that’s easier said than done.  I REALLY know it is. So here’s an example of something I went through recently when it came to wearing this beautiful red ASOS Curve jumpsuit. Looking at the jumpsuit, it’s beautiful. Really stunning. A gorgeous bright red, a lovely shape and it has that comfortable look to it. So I popped it on, knowing I feel in love with the last jumpsuit I tried. I expected that rush of OMG I LOVE IT! Instead I was a bit apprehensive. I stood on the mirror and all I could see were flaws. A bit of a camel toe if I stood in certain positions. A growing belly. Was I frumpy? Was the blog red too much? Was I going to stand out because of being fat? All of a sudden these questions come rushing through like a train until I feel like I want to go and put on some basic leggings and a tunic top. There’s nothing wrong with an outfit like that, but I know it doesn’t fill me with confidence. It just conforms to what we’ve been told (for so long) is acceptable for big women to wear.

UK plus size blogger - pretty big butterflies

ASOS Curve jumpsuit review - pretty big butterflies

Anyway. I spoke to my fiancé who is an incredibly supportive person. He really is a gem at building me up. (If you have people in your life who bring you down or don’t support you, consider recycling them!) . He told me that there is nothing wrong with wearing fashion. (That’s what we call an outfit that has a little sass to it). He told me to wear it if I liked it. I stopped for a second. I did like it. A LOT! It was gorgeously bright, a little floaty on the legs and actually looked like a real quality piece of clothing. I actively told myself to look at the positives. It was amazingly comfortable. Easy to wear and the embroidery detail was super pretty. SO WHAT if I stood out a bit in all red.

Some people might stare (and they did) but you know what. I reckon they were thinking DAMN THAT JUMPSUIT IS FIERCE!!!!!!! And why wouldn’t they? I think the biggest way of getting over your own insecurities of what others think of you is to think that actually they could be saying something nice. Just as you automatically think they’re saying something negative. It could actually be positive. I mean, you look amazing after all!

how to build self confidence - pretty big butterflies

ASOS curve blogger review - pretty big butterflies

So yes, I wore the jumpsuit and felt pretty amazing after I’d given myself a little pep talk. i also had lots of lovely compliments that evening too. It’s not about me being brave or breaking societies rules. It really isn’t. All it comes down to is me wearing what I want and not being affected by the negative messages we’ve been drip fed over the years. It’s about me accepting that I look the way I look and that’s OK. It’s about me realising the people that matter don’t mind and the people that mind don’t matter. It get’s easier. Trust me.